Trying to Get Over the Rainbow: May 2010

Cemetery Traditions: Rocks or Poop?

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Last week the usual trio of my mother, grandmother and myself made a follow up trip to the cemetery. We went to check the progress of the flowers we had planted, do you plant flowers for Memorial Day? Well we do and until this visit I did not know other faiths had different traditions. Did you know this? Do you know what they are?

We finish our planting, drive around and visit other, not so, recent relatives scattered throughout the cemetery and view the new flowers. As we made our way through the cemetery I saw the most curious sight and it nagged at me all the way home.

Memorial Day: I Don't Make Plans

Friday, May 28, 2010

Memorial day the unofficial kick off to summer and it is raining like cats and dogs, so I wonder what will this weekend bring? What surprises will the next three days unfold? If it is any thing like my past Memorial Day weekends I’m in trouble.

The rain I’m told will pass and the rest of the weekend looks good or at least for the weatherman. Myself I am not so sure. I have learned to fear this holiday and for good cause. Memorial Day weekend has always been a survival test for me.

Kentucky Squirrels Are Pompous

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

I have a battle going in my yard and now I know why. I do not know what ecology anomaly started this genetic mutation but it has gone on long enough. Besides who died and left the squirrels in charge?

Yes squirrels, did you know they are territorial creatures? That no matter what you do they will return and return with more knowledge than when they were evicted. It was not until my sister had a run-in with the furry creatures that I started to realize how pompous they really are.

Don't Ask, Don't Tell: My Version

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

We all know about the military policy of “Don’t ask, Don’t tell” but have you ever thought of it on a personal level? Wouldn’t it be nice if we all had a personal “Don’t ask, Don’t tell” policy. Well, it got me to thinking and I have decided to invoke my own “Don’t ask, Don’t tell” policy.

Don’t ask me why I have a notebook instead of a to-do list taped to my refrigerator and I will not lie to you about needing room for larger print and pictures. It has nothing to do with procrastinating and now a notebook is required to hold the to-do list.

Tranquil Gardening: Maybe a Hole to China

Monday, May 24, 2010

I just spent the weekend doing garden work and have come to the conclusion someone has lied to me. Someone has sold me the London Bridge of gardening and I bought it hook, line and sinker. Do you garden? Did you buy into this same tranquility of gardening thing?

I have yet to find this tranquility of gardening and I am beginning to think this was just a sales pitch. I have experienced every motion possible but tranquil has yet to surface. What I have found is a hobby that is more frustrating than a Rubik's cube and cheaper than a gym membership.

Frustration begins when your flowers come up and they look like a prisoner war begging for food, so you feed them. Then next you notice they now appear to be little elderly flowers, losing their hair and wrinkling up like they aged forty years over night.

I'm in Thought Preview Mode

Saturday, May 22, 2010

I have this blog category titled “Random Thoughts,” which I meant to be more of a miscellaneous catchall category. Today I fear it has a whole other meaning; it is not a category but rather a state of mind. Ever had one of those days? A day where no matter how hard you try to focus your thoughts seem to be in preview mode?

Preview mode of thoughts is unlike watching movie previews. Movie trailers generally give you the best, most catching parts of the entire movie. Thought preview mode is nothing like that, it is more like having a light bulb with a bad connection. Light, no light, let me show you.

My thought was that redneck men are actually proud they look like they live in a time warp. Which lead to; woman will proudly tell you what drugs they consume while men gladly will tell you how much it rained.

Synthetic Life, Wenlock and Mandeville

Friday, May 21, 2010

Something happened on my way to bed last night. Somewhere along the way my mental wires got crossed and I totally confused two entirely different stories. Have you ever done that? Have you ever been watching and listening to something only to get the words and pictures messed up?

Last night as I readied the house for nightly shut down and prepped the kitchen for the morning to come I switched the TV to a news channel. I just wanted my nightly fix before I went to bed but what I got almost kept me up all night.

Text Messengers Meet My Bad Angel

Thursday, May 20, 2010

As I was driving home the other day from running some errands, I began to get totally frustrated. As I looked around at the traffic that was causing my frustration an image popped into my mind. Want to know what that image was? Do you ever have dual images?

My image was a two-part picture, sort of a good angel bad angel thing. Where in the first half of the image I saw good ole Oprah preaching about text messaging and the second half was the dream of having newly installed battery rams on the front of my truck.

Blog Interrupted

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

I wanted to put a post out there for all who may be trying to follow this blog. It would seem Google Feedburner is having some real issues and I fear that you may not be receiving what you signed up for.

Apparently if you are using AOL you have suddenly stopped receiving posts, AOL does not want to play with Google. If you are following this blog through a reader for some weird reason you simply get a screen that sits blank trying to load. I fear this problem is also the reason for delay in facebook postings.

I am a Blogger not a computer expert but I will do my best to figure this situation out. I ask that you be patient and should probably visit the actual blog site until Google gets its act together.

Please continue to read "Trying To Get Over The Rainbow," and if you have experienced any problem with this blog by all means LEAVE a COMMENT.

CRS and My Grandmother

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Last night after phoning my 92-year old grandmother I was slapped with the realization that laughter really is the best medicine. When we as caring, human, shoulders to cry on, can make others laugh at their dire situations we ourselves find laughter. So, what was so dire and what did we find to laugh at?

I won’t go into the particulars but Saturday my grandmother came to the realization she cannot remember much. It must have struck her hard because I spent most of Saturday calming her fear and trying to find ways to easy her mind.

I used the obvious, she is 92, and she is not supposed to have a good memory. I tried using reason and comfort but I was not making much headway. I did manage to persuade her to go walk her troubles off and by late afternoon she had calmed back down.

Middle-aged Women's Clothing: Be Specific

Monday, May 17, 2010

Google Analytics tells me there are a large amount of you women out there that are: A) middle aged, B) still wondering what to wear and C) realizing I have no idea, and then clicking on (See Womens Clothing). Well, I have to ask, “Why are you so obsessed with your attire?” “Will you allow me to help with this search?”

Since you have landed here because you entered the search parameters “middle-aged” and “clothing.” I have to assume you know what you are looking for or do you? What exactly are you hoping to find searching with those parameters anyway?

Are you looking for middle-aged or clothing? Because I can honestly tell you the web does not recognize the two parameters as being related to each other. Middle-aged gives you one set of possible results, while clothing gives you an entirely different set of possibilities and only one possibility of the two combined. I think more search parameters need to be entered.

BP's Alternate Solutions: Just Another Day at the Beach

Sunday, May 16, 2010

I don’t mean to be the bearer of bad news but it seems BP has failed another attempt to stop the oil leak. I guess this means they are back to the other two back up ideas, siphoning and clogging this so-called leak. Exactly how are they planning to do this and what are the future implications?

First let me start by explaining this is neither a leak, nor spill. A leak is what I have in my bathroom sink where the drip, drip sound keeps me awake. A spill is something a kid does when trying to run with a glass of juice. As you see neither apply here, so what about the siphoning and clogging theories?

Unemployment and Job Search Directories

Saturday, May 15, 2010

As most of you now know, I am currently unemployed and seeking a new life. I have to ask, have you ever used an online job search directory? One like Monster.com or Career Builder? Well, I must inform you that there seems to be a problem here.

My resume indicates I have spent the last 29 years in architecture with a ton of technology experience. Since I have been around longer than computers I was forced to learn and being the curious type I was always trying to make the thing do something it was not meant to do. Thus, a cover letter indicating a change of direction in my professional life and apparently confusion has ensued.

iPad and Modern Conveniences

Friday, May 14, 2010

So you are thinking of purchasing an iPad, are you sure about that? Have you looked around the house lately and noticed all the other must have devices that now sit abandoned? Do you recall why you had to have those modern conveniences?

No I am not in the market for an iPad, I am using this as a metaphor. When I look around my house I see a history of “Had to Have” items that for whatever reason have lost there appeal. Modern advancements that where sold on the premises of being the latest and greatest must have items in their time.

American: No Sub-Title Just American

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Here is my question for the day, whatever happen to just the simple title of “American?” Can someone please explain to me why being an American needs further definition? Why is just being an American not enough?

In the past few months I have noticed the simple term American seems to be a fading description. That we no longer are known as just Americans but rather this type or that type American, why the need for sub-titles?

Women's Lib: Don't Forget to Pass It On

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Growing up in the age of women’s lib I was part of a sisterhood, a sisterhood that was for all women. A movement where women ban together, stood up for other women and fought for any woman that was wronged or oppressed, what happen? Have we skipped some generations?

In the past several years I have been exposed to the next few generations of ladies to join this sisterhood and I have a fear. A nagging suspicion someone forgot to explain this sisterhood and what these women did to achieve it. Someone forgot to tell them female injustices still exist and the future is up to them. Young ladies allow me explain this sisterhood, as apparently someone has failed to do so.

Elena Kagan: Supreme Court Nominee

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

So the President nominated a woman, Elena Kagan, for the Supreme Court, what’s the big deal? I would think the Dean of Harvard law would be an excellent candidate’ after all she has transformed legal minds into the attorneys we know today. So who is the first person I see questioning her ability? Why of course my ole buddy Mitch McConnell.

Mother's Day: For My Mom

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Today is the day in which we pay homage to those women who have sacrificed, suffered and worried most of their lives over us, their children. Today the flower prices soar and restaurants have not one empty seat but does Mom really want this? Does she really want material gifts or the gift of knowing she was a good mother?

Today I will give the gift I feel my mother would want most; knowing she was a good mother. That she did a remarkable job with very little material to work with; I know I was a handful. I want to let her know I was really listening, that I retained so much more from my informative years, more than her just being a mother.

Aliens: Finally a Weapon We Can Use

Saturday, May 8, 2010

As I have reported earlier aliens spies are here and I am so happy to report American ingenuity has found a purpose for them. What purpose, what aliens spies; you ask? Well, let me explain the situation here.

A few of my followers have been informed about these alien spies and also realize there is no weapon to battle their infiltration of your home. If you are one of the few whom have not been so informed, please take this opportunity to go back and read my post on aliens. If you are one of those followers who have been educated start jumping for joy.

Cemeteries and Tea Parties

Friday, May 7, 2010

Cemeteries and tea parties to the average person have nothing in common nor would one assume they even go together. Would you plan a day where you went from a cemetery to a tea party? One usually chooses one or the other and does not attempt both in one day; I am not that person.

Though I must say when all of this was planned it never occurred to me that to spend the morning in the cemetery, eat lunch and then attend a tea party would later sound odd. But yes, we would go from digging in the dirt on our hands and knees, to drinking tea and eating finger sandwiches.

It’s Not Raining, I’ll Go Outdoors

Thursday, May 6, 2010

I just wanted to be outdoors and enjoy the NOT raining weather; after all we just received ten inches of rain in two days. What I got was sore muscles and an adventure.

As I began my outdoor adventure the first order was to even reach the outdoors. My furry friends for whatever reason feel it is a timed event to reach the door first and the green flag is my working ball cap. Yesterday I made it to the hall before they realized I was wearing the cap. BOOM, the hat; get out of our way, we know where the door is and so the adventure begins.

Another Door Closes in Kentucky

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Have you ever heard the cliché, “for every door that closes another will open?” I have been told this my entire life and for the most part found it not to be a cliché but rather a fact. But I know for the first time in my life I have reached a door that will not open another.

We associate doors with many things in our lives; careers, opportunities, people, even chapters of time. The later of which is my associated door, the one that is closing. How do I know another door will not open? Because it is a chapter in time, the slamming of a door that has no opposite and equal reaction.

Kentucky Derby, Think of it This Way

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Saturday as I watched the Kentucky Derby at home alone, no fan fair, no parties, just another stormy Saturday afternoon. I settled in to watch all the media coverage and it only made me wonder, what is the real attraction here? Could it truly be a horse racing around an oval track that captures our interest? Perhaps the real reason is that we have more in common with those horses than we dare to imagine.

Think about it. Thoroughbred horses are breed to race, trained to perform, sent to a breeding facility and then hopefully will retire on some great bluegrass farm in Kentucky. Should they fail to perform, all sorts of gimmicks are employed and when that fails they end up at some rescue facility.

Electrical Storms Can Cause Withdraws

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Yesterday I was awakened by a clap of thunder only to have the power slowly fade to black, not a way to start a day. What was it Mom use to tell me? The angels are bowling? Well they must be holding some heavenly marathon because it is still storming. How does one survive in this day and age during an electrical storm?

As I gathered my usual power outage equipment of candles, flashlight, and battery radio a sudden terror struck me. I have no power I cannot make coffee. There are many things in life I can do without but coffee is not one of them.

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