BP's Alternate Solutions: Just Another Day at the Beach

I don’t mean to be the bearer of bad news but it seems BP has failed another attempt to stop the oil leak. I guess this means they are back to the other two back up ideas, siphoning and clogging this so-called leak. Exactly how are they planning to do this and what are the future implications?

First let me start by explaining this is neither a leak, nor spill. A leak is what I have in my bathroom sink where the drip, drip sound keeps me awake. A spill is something a kid does when trying to run with a glass of juice. As you see neither apply here, so what about the siphoning and clogging theories?

I remember siphoning; in fact it once was a local teenage hot crime. Siphon gas from some poor souls parked car and drive around town all night. The problem with siphoning for those of you who do not under stand the process; is that for one it takes a good suck effect and two someone ends up with a mouth full of gas.

Should BP decided to go through with this back-up plan I think I must warn them, it takes a lot of sucking to siphon a small gas tank let alone a gushing pipe line. But then they have the Federal Government to work with; that surely will be enough suck power for this disaster.

Then we have their idea of clogging the pipeline, exactly how are golf balls and old tires going to work? I am really not sure about this one. I once had a visiting brat who flushed an entire Match Box car collection down my toilet and only the last one did anything. The toilet still worked, flushed fine but solids did the circle dance. I don’t recall them mentioning solids in this pipeline?

As with any well planned solution we have to do a “what if” scenario. What will these solutions do to future trips to the beach? Twenty years from now do you want to visit the Gulf Coast and have to explain the weird findings you will encounter to your children? Let’s do a “what if “ scenario.

What if twenty years from now little Johnny comments on the tires now buried along the beach, this is what I hear you say; ”Yes, Johnny that does look like the stock car race course back home.” “No, it is not a race course, it is a sea monster barrier.”

Then little Susie comments on the sea shells and I hear you say, “Yes, those are neat looking shells” and “No, you cannot pick up the round, dimpled shells; they are ugly, slimy, sea monster eggs.”

Boy, what a vacation that will be.

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