Easter Bunny: Just One of Many Talents

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Today I made my usual, routine trip to the unemployment office and while there I found myself daydreaming. Daydreaming to the point I almost missed them calling my name. I had been daydreaming of jobs long since gone, jobs I really enjoyed while they lasted. Jobs I held before I grew up and life got so complicated, jobs that when I did hear my name had left a smile on my face. If you would be so kind I would like to take you on my trip down memory lane.

The first job I ever had was at a local pizza parlor helping to prepare pizzas. This was where I learned the valuable lesson of nothing is really ever free. Here I witnessed two mooching kids get offered the free pizza they so often asked for only if they could chew and not swallow an anchovy until told to swallow. Neither could and neither got their free pizza. But at least they made it outside before they lost their cookies.

My next job of note was pumping gas at an interstate specialty store. Here I learned some women truly are dangerous when it comes to their vehicles. I had never known a radiator cap could become a weapon until the day a woman drove in with her engine overheating and had been for 50 miles. But not being sexist I had a gentleman who did not know how to put air in his tires as well.

One summer while not being grown I sold hairbrushes at softball tournaments. I had no bills, lived in my car and really wanted the time to spend by my friends’ pool and play backgammon. It still amazes me so many women always forgot their hairbrush, enough I had the entire summer to play.

I have been a directory assistance operator where we could not hang up on drunks whom just wanted to talk to someone. I have assembled construction cranes where the joke of the day was to fill your toolbox with axel grease. I have renovated houses where I learned not to wipe old wallpaper paste on your pants or they stand on their own. I sold firewood while in college to professors who were too lazy to get it for themselves and was willing to pay whatever. I have even played the Easter bunny for a local daycare center and discovered there are children afraid of the furry critter.

Basically I have been a woman of many hats and as you can tell had a good time doing it. Though my family at times have glanced at me with raised eyebrows and looks of “Oh no, not again,” they have support my wild endeavors. So if you’re in need of an Easter bunny, I’m for hire.



You should have known that little children are afraid of funny creatures. I know a young woman who still doesn't like clowns. Children seem to like them from afar but "PLEASE" don't let them near me. sometimes you can't blame them.

April 1, 2010 at 10:43 PM  
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