Friday, August 27, 2010
I realize we all have fight or flight triggers, it is part of being human. I also realize my personal fight trigger is a bit on the hair trigger side. I will fight for a cause, the underdog, and even self-protection. I will not be a meek by stander when it comes to the injustices of the world, but flight? When it comes to flight triggers, I have but two.
I have spent a good deal of time conquering childhood fears but this past week has left me with an undeniable knowledge that some fears may not be surmountable. You must live with it. Last week I thought I could overcome my fear of emergency medical situations but instead I am issuing myself a warning label.
While at the hospital I was good for praying, getting meals, waiting in the hall and retrieving anything from the car. "Do not leave her alone with the patient, she freaks out." That is what my warning label will read.
Put me in this situation and I will call 911, step in the hall and freeze like a Popsicle. I am totally useless, a sissy, a basket case. No one in their right mind would leave a patient in my care. Thank the lord my family understands.
Example; we were discussing my mother having the ability to go the grocery when my father comes home. “No offense to you but I’d rather have your brother here.” No offense taken mom, I’d rather have my brother there too.
I tired my best to be strong and overcome my phobia this past week but failed. At one point my father had a severe shivering fit, freaked me totally out! I stepped into the hall and prayed. It was then I realized my sisters had to come out and check on me, I was more of a hindrance than help.
Yes, I'm running out right now and getting this tattooed on my forehead, “Do not leave alone with patient, sudden ice will appear.”
Oh, and my other flight trigger? Cock roaches. They are the scariest, ugliest things ever made and I think they are the devil. But that is another post.
There I have divulged my fear, my phobia and what makes me run. What makes you run? Is there something you just cannot seem to get past?
Everyone have a wonderful weekend.