Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Let me start by saying thank you and I’m sorry. Let me extend a warm thank you for all the lovely comments on Mondays Toilet post. I’m sorry I had so many of you worried even if for a split second. It just goes to show you anything can be a story, just change your vantage point.
You all know I’m still unemployed right? Well Monday I met a guy about doing freelance Architectural drawings from home. It felt like a double edged sword piercing my stomach.
On one hand I was glad for the chance to actually earn some income, every little bit counts. On the other hand I felt sick to my soul. Drawing the insides of a concrete block is like drinking water. You need to do it but it truly brings you no pleasure.
I was Skyping Ms. Twister last night (which I’m in love with Skype) and talking about creativity. I was telling her how for the first time in a VERY long time I felt my creativity coming back. How the dark clouds, depression and the simply going through the motions had started to lift. I’m now experiencing that feeling of actually living a life in lieu of existing in a life.
She agreed and had noticed the change. You see my creativity encompasses the entire art world. I like them all; music, painting, sketching, photography, stained glass, crafts and of course writing. The art of expression through whatever medium is available.
In saying that, now you see why drawing the 6 lines to indicate the inside of a concrete block just does nothing for me anymore. Finally I’m happy but broke. So here is my state of the union message for this Wednesday.
The good lord but me in this situation for a reason. You don’t have to believe in god but I do, no pressure. I feel for the past ten years he has been pounding me on the head to change, this is not where I want you.
Okay, I’m listening. Where am I suppose to be? It will come; I know this in my heart. Whether it be through the written word or paint on canvas it will come. Who knows it maybe both?
For some weird reason I have not felt the tinge of worry, yet. Through my written words I have found a voice; a light, a place of contentment. It is what I think all writers feel but my contentment leads to sketches, leads to a craft project, leads to a picture, a song and then back to written words.
Call it a phase, a transformation, a lit path, whatever; I’m on a journey of the soul. My higher power has a purpose for me and that I feel in every inch of my being. I’m in the “Snatch the pebble from my hand, grasshopper,” phase.
Where all this will lead, only heaven knows at this point, there is a plan. So for now I will drag myself to the other PC, belly up and produce lovely drawings of concrete block innards. But I’ll be hurrying so I can get back to my journey and you guys.
(The house now stands and gives a rousing round of applause)
For those of you in the grip of this monster storm be safe, be patient, be warm and stay in. My thoughts are with you.
Until Friday my friends.