Monday, December 13, 2010
Our lovely County Attorney offered me a fine of $150, ($63 cheaper than paying the ticket), preform 4 hours of community service and attend 1 hour of traffic school. I signed up and honestly am glad I did. My thanksgiving post came from the community service obligation and truly was a gift. Last week I completed the one hour traffic school.
Arriving early I sat in the car, no one wants to be the first to arrive, right? Soon I realized why some of the people truly were there. A gentlemen arrived, pulled in, car not in the space allotted and I swear I could see him ponding his chest. “Ah, I’m parked.” My thought, “Yeah, at a 45 degree angle taking up three spaces and if someone did hit that rust bucket it would vanish into thin air.”
Next came a lady who arrived in the most expensive, large SUV made. Watching her almost take out half the parked cars sent a shiver down my spine. Apparently the first space did not match her vehicle and a space two over was more chic. When she got out, I swear, there were four books on the seat, a booster chair. No wonder the brake pedal eluded her.
Through the metal detector and up to the sixth floor we all went. The room was similar to a high school classroom, including those hard chairs that deform you should you sit more than an hour in them.
Here is the synopsis of what evolved during class.
Distracted driving: People at times have no idea where they are going and even less of an idea of how they get there. One lady proudly proclaim in public she was going to work and without realizing it, ended up at the mall. Her defense; she did not have one.
Hand placement: 2 and 10 are out, 3 and 9 are in. Air bags will rip your hands right off and short people like me are just dead. In order to reach the pedals we are way too close to the air bag. Maybe a helmet?
Merging: Do not try this in Kentucky! They do not understand right-of-way. They think you have to move over and if you do not the demolition derby will begin.
Round-abouts: We only have two and the consensus; police installed them as speeding traps. Yes, we Kentuckians love to speed on turns. This is why we gave up mules.
Drinking and driving: .8 is drunk. Anything below that, including .79, means you can drive. I think the county attorney heard me gasp at that one.
Road rage: Hand gestures are a no-no, don’t even look at them, just get their license plate number. In Kentucky citizens can file a complaint against this behavior, go to court and testify just as a policeman would, YEEHAW! The icing on the cake…
This applies to law enforcement. Turning their lights on to get across traffic to go into Wal-Mart is not legal, I asked.
Needless to say when I left the class I just sat there. After hearing the responses I felt it safer to let my classmates have a head start. Hopefully, my driving record is clean again and expunged as if I had never done anything wrong.
Final reminder, driving is a privilege not a right. Extend the same courtesy behind the wheel as you would walking.