I Have a Secret Admirer......
Friday, July 23, 2010
Yesterday I came to think I must have a secret admirer. Not the average; send me flowers, send me a gift admirer, but rather a thoughtful admirer or so I believed. How do you know they are admirers, anyway?
Aren’t secret admirers generally someone whom we leave a wonderful lasting impression with? Someone that follows up with an unexpected something and a note that reads, “Thank you, a secret admirer?” I can honestly think of no such encounter recently.
But then, my secret admirer left no such note, just numerous unexpected items all in the form of emails. They seem to have my best interest at heart or at least that is what I hoped.
In the morning my admirer sent me emails suggesting I improve for my personal state-of-affairs. It was recommended that I look into my future financial plan and I may not have enough insurance. Please checkout the AARP website. Oh, that is sweet, who told you my age?
By early afternoon I had several emails concerning very personal topics. It was suggested I look into female drugs that would heighten my libido and a link to a “Senior Dating Service” followed. I don’t have time for a libido; I’m looking for a job, which means I cannot afford a senior dating service. Unless you are suggesting I take the drugs and look into the senior brothel business. Hum, that is a thought.
The last few I opened struck me with fear. I fear this admirer has turned stalker and is forwarding hate mail. They are now sending demands that I get liposuction and breast implants. Well, I have no lipo to suck and breasts on a tooth pick seem like over kill to me. “Just ignore them,” I thought.
That was when I noticed….……..
Poo, I’m reading the SPAM folder.
I find a great deal of humor in SPAM. Everyone have a safe and wonderful weekend. When you return, may your inbox be totally spam free.
Aren’t secret admirers generally someone whom we leave a wonderful lasting impression with? Someone that follows up with an unexpected something and a note that reads, “Thank you, a secret admirer?” I can honestly think of no such encounter recently.
But then, my secret admirer left no such note, just numerous unexpected items all in the form of emails. They seem to have my best interest at heart or at least that is what I hoped.
In the morning my admirer sent me emails suggesting I improve for my personal state-of-affairs. It was recommended that I look into my future financial plan and I may not have enough insurance. Please checkout the AARP website. Oh, that is sweet, who told you my age?
By early afternoon I had several emails concerning very personal topics. It was suggested I look into female drugs that would heighten my libido and a link to a “Senior Dating Service” followed. I don’t have time for a libido; I’m looking for a job, which means I cannot afford a senior dating service. Unless you are suggesting I take the drugs and look into the senior brothel business. Hum, that is a thought.
The last few I opened struck me with fear. I fear this admirer has turned stalker and is forwarding hate mail. They are now sending demands that I get liposuction and breast implants. Well, I have no lipo to suck and breasts on a tooth pick seem like over kill to me. “Just ignore them,” I thought.
That was when I noticed….……..
Poo, I’m reading the SPAM folder.
I find a great deal of humor in SPAM. Everyone have a safe and wonderful weekend. When you return, may your inbox be totally spam free.
4 comments:
You had me worried for a moment.
Good last line.
Yvonne.
You have to wonder how some people get your email. I just received something from AARP and I'm only 35. I wondered if I should put it in a safe place since I suspect that by the time I need it I will be receiving fertility emails.
Visiting from SITS.
Lol! I have yet to turn 32 and I keep getting stuff from AARP. Oh, wait, I think that's addressed to my mother in law. Nope, never mind, that envelope was for me.
My funny spam stuffs usually consists of penis enlargement AND breast implants. Pretty sure the spammers are confused or just assume I am. Hope you have a great weekend!
Sorry to worry you Yvonne. Mary, hang on to it and thanks for stopping by. Kimberly, glad you saw the humor.
To all have a good weekend :)
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