I’m Coming Out

Friday, October 7, 2011

You unplug, take a break and go to sleep. Only to find you wake up with questions that require real thought to answer. What have I learned in the last two weeks? Where have I been?

Valid questions that one would think one could answer or at least account for. I’m not sure I actually know where I have been but I have learned a few things. Allow me to come out and share.

Lesson 1: Depression is contagious. I found one of my dogs toting around an empty Vodka bottle. Immediately I sat her down and had the discussion of how, “drinking does not solve anything.” She burped at me.

Lesson 2: Bullies are not that smart. Ask the autistic girl who was put on the home coming ballot as a cruel joke and won. A huge chest bump to that high school.

Lesson 3: The Federal Government is serious about their paper work. I forgot to complete their follow-up census survey and their response…. they sent an auditor to my house to help me fill it out.

Lesson 4: I am too isolated and need to get out more. I did and now I’m thinking of filing attempted murder charges against the woman welding the deadly shopping cart.

Lesson 5: I have a paper fetish. I have been moving my office to another room in the house and discovered I’m a paper freak. I even found origami paper, I don’t know how to origami.

Lesson 6: Prohibition, we got screwed. After watching the documentary I realized we were returned the right to drink in exchange for income tax and NASCAR. Am I the only one who thinks this not a fair exchange?

Lesson 7: The world is in rewind but confused. It now is wearing 80’s fashion while preforming 70’s sit-ins. If you guys see a bunch of women gathered around a 50 gallon drum you’d better get a fire extinguisher because you have to know what is coming next.

I have so many more of these little snippet lessons but I’ll save a few for later. Just know I’m here gathering knowledge and hoping the best for all of you.

Have a great weekend!


Jessica Bell said, 

LOL. Were you ever a stand-up comedian? ;o) You should be ...

October 7, 2011 at 8:44 AM  
welcome to my world of poetry said, 

Welcome back, depression is not a pleasant thing but there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Have a lovley week-end.

October 7, 2011 at 8:45 AM  
Melissa Bradley said, 

Hey Jules!! I know it's been forever since I've been here. Treading water myself with all kinds of stuff dragging at me of late. These little lessons were funny and very sharp-witted. Hugs and hope you have a wonderful weekend. :)

October 7, 2011 at 8:57 AM  
Manzanita said, 

Little snippets hang on the fringe but if you put them all together you can see the big picture. You did so beautifully and with your sly humor. I LOD at the image of your dog running around with a bottle. :) A simply wonderful weekend to you, too.


October 7, 2011 at 9:06 AM  
Alex J. Cavanaugh said, 

Hey Jules! Good to hear from you. Those were great. Think I like the lesson learned from your alcoholic dog the best.

October 7, 2011 at 9:36 AM  
Paula said, 

Oh, yes, I am glad that you venture out more, sorry about the shopping cart though :-)))) Glad you are around again. Missed you very much. Wondered whether I should send another of my I am concerned notes...

October 7, 2011 at 10:22 AM  
Kathie @ Like A Box Of Chocolates said, 

brilliant post Jules :-) love it.

have a great weekend

October 7, 2011 at 1:44 PM  
The Golden Eagle said, 

Love the snippets. :)

Hooray for that school!

October 7, 2011 at 3:55 PM  
February Grace said, 

Thinking of you Jules.

under the heading of 'depression is contagious' it's why I'm thinking about dropping my blog again. don't need to add any more sad to the world you know?

thank you for adding lots of happy to it.


October 7, 2011 at 4:03 PM  
Susan Flett Swiderski said, 

It sounds like you were smiling when you wrote this. That's super. No room for depression when there's a smile on your face. Thanks for the chuckles. Take care, and have a great weekend.

October 7, 2011 at 4:20 PM  
floweringmama said, 

I like your dog - sounds more intelligent than most of the people I'm surrounded by daily.

I hope you are smiling a little bit each day.

October 7, 2011 at 4:25 PM  
Larri @ Seams Inspired said, 

So happy to see you my friend! I was gettin' worried. ☺ Thanks for the giggles...especially the burpin' dog. My dog isn't that clever. He only passes gas. Happy Friday! ☺

October 7, 2011 at 7:02 PM  
Tammy said, 

So glad you're out with a vengeance and sounding like your old self! You and your fun posts were definitely missed.

October 7, 2011 at 7:16 PM  
Journaling Woman said, 

Great lessons. Yes, depression is contagious. It's very sad when dogs drink vodka. :) They don't walk that straight as it is.

October 8, 2011 at 9:06 AM  
Karen Lange said, 

Jessica could be right, comedy may be your thing. Even if you aren't always trying to be funny you offer an interesting perspective.

Hope you have a good weekend. :) Take care.

October 8, 2011 at 1:31 PM  
li said, 

getting out of the house is overrated. And dogs are much nicer drunks than many humans - alcohol doesn't make them angry and stupid, just pleasantly floppy.

October 8, 2011 at 4:50 PM  
Velvet Over Steel said, 

You always come back Full Force, Jules! Love it and so glad to see you came back (or came out).. :-)

I so needed the laughs and 'uplift' so much tonight. Crazy, busy weekend that went way too fast. So thank you for putting a smile on my face before going to sleep. :-)

Hope and pray you're feeling better my friend!!
Big Hugh Hug,
Coreen XOXO

October 9, 2011 at 10:28 PM  
Jayne said, 

Jules- So good to have you back, in tact, as funny and darling as ever.

I have that same paper fetish. You should learn how to make origami birds, and then you can make your words fly! (As if they don't already.)

October 9, 2011 at 11:54 PM  
GigglesandGuns said, 

Your dog and I have so much in common :-)

October 10, 2011 at 12:02 PM  
N. R. Williams said, 

Vodka, dogs, and burping. If you weren't depressed you'd have the giggles.
N. R. Williams, Fantasy Author

October 10, 2011 at 12:44 PM  
Arlee Bird said, 

Sometimes maybe I'd just like to get inside that alligator and watch the world from there. I kind of get what you're saying--I think.

Tossing It Out

October 10, 2011 at 6:52 PM  
Green Monkey said, 

Big smile here! Love reading you. Humor heals

October 11, 2011 at 9:12 AM  
Theresa Milstein said, 

Go, autistic girl and the students who voted for her!

I'm sorry your dog has a drinking problem.

I was a bit sad that the best women could do with their new right to vote was to banish drinking. Of course that wasn't going to last. It ruined their credibility. Think of what that could've asked for instead.

October 11, 2011 at 10:06 AM  
Ella said, 

Miss you; I have been held captive by my sinuses! It ain't pretty~
I almost took a photo to prove the point, but I was doing a haunted poem and didn't want to look the part. The walking dead look is not in vogue. You are a nut; I love all of these. You should write a book like this and yes, you could do stand up! ;D

October 12, 2011 at 12:36 AM  
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