“A” as in Ammunition

Friday, April 1, 2011

Welcome to the month long blog fest of the A-Z challenge. For how this works and to find others participating visit Tossin it Out and ask for Lee.

For my first day and the letter “A” I have chosen Ammunition. I’m not talking bullets here. I’m talking a Kentucky woman's version of ammunition. Know what I mean?



If you’re a male in the state of Kentucky you watch your P’s and Q’s, should you step out of line; chances are you will never see it coming. Most women here have been educated in the fine art of revenge and proper male training.

Should a male step out of line this is how it goes.

First offense: the evil eye; as in, “Keep on and you will regret it in the morning.”

Second offense: served the ugliest, nastiest tasting, cold dinner you can imagine, followed by a “Cat swallowed the canary” smile. Do not be deceived

Should you commit a third offense... bed as usual, only to be awaken by the tight nylons constricting your extremities. As you stare at those constraints, bewildered as to how freedom will be achieved, this is what you will not see coming….

The biggest cast-iron skillet momma could hand down to her. The first words  you will hear, “Morning honey, how did you sleep?”

Ammunition, the Kentucky female version.

Peace…




65 comments:

welcome to my world of poetry said, 

A wonderful start to the challenge Jules, loved the read.
Good luck for the next 25 posts.

Yvonne.

April 1, 2011 at 4:02 AM  
Gail M Baugniet said, 

Bet Kentucky has the most well-behaved husbands in the USA!

April 1, 2011 at 4:05 AM  
M.J. Fifield said, 

I am furiously scribbling down notes for future reference...


M.J. Fifield
My Pet Blog

April 1, 2011 at 4:28 AM  
Pk Hrezo said, 

LOL! You're so funny. Oh, what? You're not kidding? Ah, knew I liked you. :)

April 1, 2011 at 5:07 AM  
Tracy said, 

Let the challenge begin; and a good beginning for you!
Have a good day Jules...

April 1, 2011 at 5:40 AM  
Jennifer Shirk said, 

I can pretty deadly with the evil eye too--for a New Jersian. LOL!

April 1, 2011 at 6:10 AM  
li said, 

ROFL Oh Jules, you kill me. I really did serve up a cold dinner or two. Unfortunately, he had a rather unrefined palate and didn't comment. I had to actually go on strike and not serve dinner at all!

April 1, 2011 at 6:27 AM  
Siv Maria said, 

Ha ha, How appropriate! Could you please send over some of that amunition, I need it to kill my computer :)

April 1, 2011 at 6:39 AM  
Liz P said, 

Oh dear! Thanks for the chuckle. Great post!

April 1, 2011 at 6:47 AM  
Hold my hand: a social worker's blog said, 

HAHAHAHA Oh my goodness, my tummy hurts, I must learning a lot today... I need that ammunition sometimes :-))

Great post, Jules, wonderful way to start your A to Z...

And thanks for stopping by my blog and your kind comments, greatly appreciated comments :-)

Doris

April 1, 2011 at 7:31 AM  
Manzanita said, 

Strong skillets make good husbands. Also sounds like Montana.
Manzanita
Wanna buy a duck

April 1, 2011 at 7:31 AM  
Charmaine Clancy said, 

Aussie girls are similar, except we have a zero tolerance enforcement and we don't aim for the face. Great start for A-Z :)

April 1, 2011 at 7:49 AM  
Dan said, 

Spare the skillet, spoil the husband. Great post! Thanks for the chuckle.

Dan

April 1, 2011 at 7:55 AM  
Kathie @ Just a Happy Housewife said, 

I'd never heard of "taking a bullet" for a man until my husband told me about my brother-in-law using that phrase....

April 1, 2011 at 8:18 AM  
Summer Ross said, 

LOL- Love the pan- my mom once told me that men are bigger and stronger- she only used a pan to level out the playing field. LOL Thanks for the smile and I'm thrilled you are participating in this blogfest!

April 1, 2011 at 8:38 AM  
Vicki Rocho said, 

Think I need to go get me a pan....

(totally kidding)

April 1, 2011 at 8:50 AM  
Stephen Tremp said, 

We bought Tangled and of course she uses a frying pan to do her whacking. Makes a great weapon for self defense too. I use pans in my first chapter as some chefs beat the hell out of bad guys with cast iron skillets as they try to pass through their kitchen.

April 1, 2011 at 9:08 AM  
Karen Walker said, 

Love this, Jules. Just love it.
Karen

April 1, 2011 at 9:19 AM  
~Nicole Ducleroir~ said, 

Haha! I love it! Go, women of Kentucky!! The rest of us have been duly and irreversibly enlightened. Education is, as always, the KEY to a successful life!!!! LOL

April 1, 2011 at 9:21 AM  
Dafeenah said, 

That doesn't go just for Kentucky. I think it's training all southern women get. No matter where they are from. We got those lessons too!

Stopping by from the Challenge!
Dafeenah

April 1, 2011 at 9:26 AM  
Nf1andprek-whisper said, 

is this fiction or true I never knew this.. so funny

April 1, 2011 at 9:35 AM  
busy91 said, 

Love it! Great start to the challenge.

April 1, 2011 at 9:37 AM  
baygirl32 said, 

what a hilarious start to the A to Z challenge! great post

http://baygirl32.blogspot.com

April 1, 2011 at 9:39 AM  
Melissa Bradley said, 

LOL...I love this. Kentucky style male training rocks. Great kick off to the chalenege. Can't wait to see what else you have in store.

April 1, 2011 at 10:04 AM  
salarsenッ said, 

'K, this was great! I am officially in love with Kentucky woman now. Nice to meet you. I'm a follower now. Looking forward to more posts!

April 1, 2011 at 10:24 AM  
B's Mom said, 

Love it! Way to start the challenge!

April 1, 2011 at 10:27 AM  
Angela Ackerman said, 

Talk about starting the challenge with a bang! Okay, corny I know, but someone had to say it...

Angela @ The Bookshelf Muse

April 1, 2011 at 10:35 AM  
Holly Ruggiero said, 

Great, great post! Keep those men in line!

April 1, 2011 at 10:46 AM  
Margo Kelly said, 

WOW! Awesome post. LOVE LOVE LOVE it! hahaha

April 1, 2011 at 11:22 AM  
Trevor Peck said, 

My wife must have a little "Kentucky" in her! Happy A2Z!

April 1, 2011 at 11:24 AM  
Misha said, 

Lol I loved this post.

I'm going to take notes now and reread. ;-)

April 1, 2011 at 11:41 AM  
RosieC said, 

Hon, you crack me up. But, it's true. I've had my own bit of southern upbringing, and, yeah, I am practiced in the evil eye. Unfortunately, all my cooking's pretty gross, so I have to skip #2 :)

April 1, 2011 at 11:45 AM  
Mary Vaughn said, 

My mood is ok and I am totally out of coffee. What the heck did you run out of? ;o)

April 1, 2011 at 12:21 PM  
Ann said, 

Oh Jules this is priceless. Pass the skillet please....

April 1, 2011 at 12:32 PM  
Talli Roland said, 

Love this one - made me giggle! Great way to start off the challenge!

April 1, 2011 at 12:41 PM  
Myne Whitman said, 

This made me laugh when I read it. I was pleasantly surprised after seeing the picture, lol...

April 1, 2011 at 12:48 PM  
Ann Best said, 

This is a very creative definition of Ammunition. I love it.

April 1, 2011 at 1:37 PM  
Tiger85 said, 

Love, Love this. Can't wait to see your next posts for this challenge. =)

http://tigeronmybookshelf.blogspot.com/

April 1, 2011 at 1:58 PM  
Clarissa Draper said, 

I have been warned! Thanks for this amusing yet informative post.

April 1, 2011 at 2:03 PM  
Nezzy said, 

I'm thinkin' that Hubs did somethin' to tick ya off! Heeehehe!!

Just goes to show ya...ya don't mess with a Kentucky woman or any woman with ammunition. :o)

You crack me up Jules!!!

God bless ya and have a fantastic weekend sweetie!!!

April 1, 2011 at 2:13 PM  
The Golden Eagle said, 

LOL. I must take notes!

Great start to the Challenge!

April 1, 2011 at 2:14 PM  
Paula said, 

I NEED to be Kentucky trained.

April 1, 2011 at 2:20 PM  
Bossy Betty said, 

Gotta share this with the Hubby and ask him if he wants to move to Kentucky!

April 1, 2011 at 2:32 PM  
Laura Howard said, 

Go Kentucky! How funny!

April 1, 2011 at 2:34 PM  
Hilary Melton-Butcher said, 

Hi Jules .. I think I'm with Paula on this one - I need to be Kentucky trained .. great read - thanks - Hilary

April 1, 2011 at 2:37 PM  
N. R. Williams said, 

LOL Jules, I'm going to let my husband know that he's mighty lucky I don't come from Kentucky.
Nancy
N. R. Williams, The Treasures of Carmelidrium.

April 1, 2011 at 2:58 PM  
Jan Morrison said, 

Up north we don't give them three chances and we don't dirty our nice frying pans with their blood. We pack it up and head out.
Jan Morrison

April 1, 2011 at 3:19 PM  
Eric W. Trant said, 

In Texas, Step 3 is replaced by locking you outside your house on a cold night in your underwear, just because you stepped into the yard to whizz.

Step 4 is threatening to burn your house down.

Step 5 is actually doing it.

- Eric

April 1, 2011 at 3:54 PM  
Velvet Over Steel said, 

As soon as I saw 'A is for Ammuniction' I laughed out load and pictured you with a shotgun!!

Great post & Good luck this month!!

Have a Wonderful weekend, Jules!!
Hugs,
Coreen xoxo

April 1, 2011 at 3:57 PM  
Bob Sanchez said, 

Loaded for bear! Good post.

April 1, 2011 at 4:04 PM  
blogger sam said, 

lock n' load. great opening

April 1, 2011 at 4:35 PM  
nutschell said, 

Girl power! Love this. What a fun and funny start to the A-Z challenge. Nutschell
www.thewritingnut.com

April 1, 2011 at 5:23 PM  
The Words Crafter said, 

LOL!!!! My sister's ex wouldn't let her have a cast iron pan for that very reason. Great post!!!

April 1, 2011 at 5:27 PM  
Tyrean Martinson said, 

So funny! I loved this post. Reminds me of one of my relatives . . .and I'm not sure that's good or not. However, she was a strong lady.

April 1, 2011 at 5:47 PM  
Seams Inspired said, 

Bestill my heart...a true Southern gal who knows how to keep her husband in line!


Visiting from the A to Z Challenge. Looking forward to reading your posts. Happy Friday! :o)

April 1, 2011 at 7:31 PM  
Karen Lange said, 

Now see, as a relative newcomer (7 years in May) to KY, I was not aware of this. Good thing we met; now I know. Great Challenge kick off! :)
Happy weekend,
Karen

April 1, 2011 at 8:15 PM  
Rachael Harrie said, 

Great Challenge entry Jules! And lovely to have a chuckle too :)

Hugs

Rach

April 1, 2011 at 8:47 PM  
Ella said, 

Hot Damn, that is one hell of a wake up call! Funny Jules, thanks for sharing your technique ;-D

April 1, 2011 at 9:24 PM  
Lynda R Young said, 

Hahaha, so funny. Great start to the challenge :)
Lyn
W.I.P. It: A Writer's Journey

April 1, 2011 at 9:31 PM  
Sheila said, 

That was funny! I like that kind of ammunition. Nice job.


~~Sheila
Reviewer & Writer
Book reviews and Author Interviews at my blog at http://whynotbecauseisaidso.blogspot.com/

April 1, 2011 at 10:18 PM  
Tammy said, 

There should be a requirement that women go to Kentucky for premarital school. Finishing school. Now that is some powerful ammo.

April 3, 2011 at 3:02 PM  
Arlee Bird said, 

You really got off to a big start with A. 63 comments on a post that I'm not letting my wife read, though she's Ecuadorian just like Lorena Bobbitt and I'm not going to step out of line with her.

Have a great A to Z!

Contrary to my usual practice of subscribing to comments, to save time during challenge I will not be doing so during April. If you want to respond to my comment , please email me directly from your email notification for the comment.
Thanks.
Lee
Tossing It Out
Twitter hashtag: #atozchallenge

April 4, 2011 at 7:44 PM  
Jayne said, 

Ouch! Sounds like Kentucky is good place for lady to live. Maybe not so much her man, though.
Girl--you've gone blog wild! I can see you're having one helluva time with the A to Z!

April 5, 2011 at 10:25 PM  
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